Before I get to my NYC 1/2 Marathon race report, I had to get some thoughts out on everything related to our move. In short, things are going really, really well. And it terrifies me.
We are moving along through the purchase process in Chicago. The inspection was pretty good, with only minor issues; Our financing process is progressing and we are looking to close the week before Eugene; We got a estimate back for some work we want to do on the home and it came in WAY below what we expected to pay.
We also accepted a near full-price offer on our home in Greenville this morning…and we never even put it on the market. The couple buying wants to close on April 19th, the week before we close in Chicago, which makes the relocation process ideal.
I couldn’t ask for things to be going better. But I can’t tell you how many times I have said to my mom, “It’s too good to be true.” or “Something will go wrong. I just know it.”
I don’t know why I feel like we don’t deserve for things to come together or why I can’t just be happy that so many things seem to be falling into place, but I am on pins and needles waiting for the bottom to drop out. My mind is racing to come up with all of the things that could go wrong and I laid awake in bed last night, exhausted, but unable to shut off my brain.
Maybe this is natural…just a normal part of a big life change? Maybe I am struggling with something else that I never recognized in myself before? Maybe its because life has been full of such HIGH highs and such LOW lows the last several weeks? For example, when we were house hunting in Chicago, in a matter of 48 hours, I went from the huge high of celebrating Brad accepting the job and Char’s BQ, to finding out Ernie was really sick the same day my dad was having major back surgery and my grandma was admitted to the hospital. All those things added to the stress of finding a home and moving and it felt like my world was falling apart. Then 2 days later, everyone was home, recovering and life went back to normal again. It was pretty bizarre.
Through all of this, running has been the only constant. You might think that marathon training would add more stress, but I have found it to be a blessing. Being committed to my plan during peak marathon training keeps me from letting excuses get in the way of what is always the perfect therapeutic outlet. I know you all know exactly what I mean…running puts everything into perspective. What seems stressful at the start of a run, can melt away as I pound out repeats on the track or push through the last tempo miles of a tough workout. I find it really easy to pour myself into marathon training when the rest of my life gets hectic. It’s the only thing that I feel like is steady in my life.
Well, that was a big unloading of emotion there…and I am not sure if I really even said anything. Don’t be surprised to see more of these brain dumps over the next few months. I suppose getting a journal would be more rational, but why do that when I can put all of my thoughts out on the internet for the whole world to read??